Monday, May 24, 2010


After a great trip this weekend to Chicago, I want to reflect on a few things that cross my mind when flying.

1 - I love riding in an airplane. LOVE it. I think taking off is the closest most ordinary people get to an otherworldly experience. I should've been a pilot, John Travolta had the right idea. But he probably decided to fly for the little pilot's cap alone.

2 - Why does most luggage have to be so boring and similar? I want the balls to get a custom suitcase with a big design of naked, sexy Donald Duck on it. That way when it comes around on the conveyor belt it will be a beacon in a sea of boring maroons and navy blues. Then I can confidently declare in front of a crowd of shocked passengers - "that one's mine!" I pick it up, shoot a knowing glance at a gawking & shocked elderly man and roll on about my business.

3 - I always think of my favorite memory of flying with my family. My mom, my dad and I were coming back from Florida (where else?) and getting close to DC. The plane had started its descent and we were going over the Potomac River bridge we are all so familiar with. The same bridge my mom would cross into Virginia for cheap cigarettes and gas. It was very close to our house and my mom was very excited to have spotted it first. I was on the aisle, my dad in the middle and my mom pointed next to the window.

My mom: "Look, Mike! The Potomac River bridge!" My dad leaned over slowly, (his only adverb).

My mom: "...MIKE look DOWN, why are you looking UP!?"

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