Tuesday, October 27, 2009

warning - disturbing

So porn can be pretty bad stuff. I don't know if you noticed.

I am deeply disturbed by this. So much for looking for porn a woman can enjoy. A majority of what you come across in the internet porn world involves embarrassing, shaming, humiliating, shitting on, and otherwise, annihilating women. And take a closer look at the image above - this is what women deserve. I could put my fist through my computer right now.

We wonder why our culture is so perversely obsessed with shaming women. We wonder why so many "normal" men rape women. Well, it's because that's what women really want. Jesus Christ that's disgusting.

It's funny, because early today I was reading about a report from the Daily Mail stating the unlikeliness of women being raped - rather, it's their willing submission to the effects of alcohol:

Dr Adam Burgess, from the University of Kent school of social policy, said rumours about the prevalence of date-rape drugs were little more than an urban myth.

This led young women to underestimate real risks of alcohol misuse, which can include impaired judgment putting them at risk of sexual assault.

'The reason why fear of drink-spiking has become widespread seems to be a mix of it being more convenient to guard against than the effects of alcohol itself and the fact that such stories are exotic - like a more adult version of "stranger danger".'

Once again, somehow, this is our fault. Deluded with false hopes of a dangerous and exotic experience with a man we don't know, we consume alcohol in the hopes of being taken advantage of. It has nothing to do with being surrounded by men who smile upon these convenient situations. The men have nothing to do with this at all. In fact, we would probably find a way to rape ourselves if we could, just to get the experience we shamefully and secretly hope for. WHAT?

It's these images, and these reports that reinforce the mistreatment and degradation of women. Period.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Oklahoma abortion

Ooooklahoma where they don't want any a-bor-tiooons.

OK is at it again, in another attempt to shame women seeking abortions. They are now forcing every woman seeking an abortion to fill out a dossier, ten page document, answering questions about her relationship to the "father," etc. In addition, to continue the echo of shame, they are posting the names of these women on a website, along with their information, for the enjoyment of all the finger-pointers and gossip-enjoyers.

For some reason, it seems like the conservatives of the mid-west, or, the mid-west, believe that if given the opportunity every woman would have an abortion. It's like abortion is some self-satisfying, pleasurable activity that women really get a kick out of.

That must be why Oklahoma is fighting so hard to keep women from getting abortions. God forbid a woman be allowed to do something she enjoys. Except that WOMEN DO NOT ENJOY ABORTIONS. It's astounding to me to think that these conservatives can parade around under the title of Pro-Lifers thinking they are fighting the evils of premarital-or otherwise forbidden-sex. As though the women seeking abortions ought to be donning black hooded capes and carrying scythes. Because it's obvious that the antithesis of Pro-Life is Pro-Death.

Having an abortion already carries its own scruples for most women. I can't think of anyone who would said it's an awarding experience. It is a difficult decision and a personal battle that WOMEN are asked to make and to fight. For many women it is a trying and saddening experience, for others it is no more than an inconvenience, a necessary evil, if you will. But the underscore of this entire discussion is the fact that it is a personal decision which should be left entirely up to every woman who is faced with it.

Are men looked at as murderers when they have a vasectomy? Or other women when they have a hysterectomy? If someone does not want to have children that is their business and nobody elses.

Here's some advice for the pro-lifers in OK - If you are so upset about an abortion, why not have a baby yourself? If for nothing else to make up for the "void" caused by that singular abortion. I would warn you that you would have to have a lot more than one child to make up for all of the abortions that have taken place in the past decade, let alone centuries. But don't stop there, have children to make up for the millions of women who have lost their lives in makeshift abortions prior to 1972. That is your choice.

Friday, October 16, 2009

cosmetic surgery is sexy

I will admit that I've never seen this show. I can't imagine why I wouldn't want to with ads like this!

Obviously, a very popular show, as the prevalence of plastic surgery continues to rise. This type of show, and these types of ads are further glorification of the gruesome alteration of a woman's body. But don't men get plastic surgery, too? Yes, of course they do. But how sexy and appealing would it be to have a man in this type of TV ad? Stitches on his calves, or across his pecs. That wouldn't sell shit.

The woman in the ad is clearly not the average woman who would be going in for this type of surgery. Why would perfection need to be altered? For that matter, why would any woman need to be altered?

This is not the face of cosmetic surgery. I've never been a witness to this type of surgery, but I'm fairly certain it would not involve a woman standing in red heels with longer-than-average legs. Not to mention the fact that she is not under anesthesia, nor are the male doctors in scrubs.

The premise just seems like a bit too much. A woman needs a man to make her feel more attractive. I can't say that I'm immune to this type of thinking. I have my own insecurities, for sure. But these types of shows just reinforce the same ideas that are already floating around incessantly in our brain, despite our protests.

Female Patient - "Hi, I'm a very attractive female, can you make me even more attractive?"
Male Surgeon - "Of course I can. And maybe afterward, we can have sex."

Thursday, October 15, 2009

are you kidding me??

This is an ad for Ralph Lauren. Or an attempt to make women everywhere pull their hair out because they are physically unable to make their head bigger than their hips.

The model, Filippa Hamilton, was recently fired for being "overweight" and "unable to fit into their clothes." Filippa is 5'10'' and weights 120 lbs. That gives her a Body Mass Index of 17.2. Anything below 18.5 is considered underweight.

I would be curious to find out exactly how skinny advertisers and companies want their models to be. Maybe, once they come within reaching distance of death by undernourishment and they're lying in their hospital bed with little ability to move or speak, this would suffice for a good model. They could always just photoshop the feeding tubes out.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

the feminismo herself

I want to write down a few excerpts from The Feminine Mystique, the Betty Friedan classic. This is mostly so I don't forget them. Sometimes you dog-ear books and then forget all about them. Hopefully this won't happen to me. Anyways, here are some of the best parts (according to me) -

pg 95
When Susan B Anthony & her women captains collected 6,000 signatures [in favor of women's suffrage] in 10 weeks, the New York State Assembly received them with roars of laughter.

pg 123
[The Freudian theme] provided a convenient escape from the atom bomb, McCarthy, all the disconcerting problems that might spoil the taste of steaks, and cars and color television and backyard swimming pools.

pg 164
A girl may learn certain surface skills and activities of the feminine role, but she will be thought ungraceful and unfeminine if her efforts toward femininity are too clearly conscious.

pg 192
...the state or quality of being mature; ripeness, full development...independence of thought and action - the quality of being fully human. Which is not quite the same as femininity.

pg. 227
(in an interview with an American advertiser in the 1960s)
Friedan - Why doesn't the pie-mix ad tell the woman she could us the time saved [from making the pie from scratch] to be an astronomer?
Advertiser - It wouldn't be too difficult...but no. The client would be too frightened. He wants to sell pie mix. The woman has to want to stay in the kitchen- and we show him how to do it the right way.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Quiver lip, quiver

Religion confuses me.

I was recently reading about Quiverful families. They are a growing phenomenon of fundamentalist Christians, especially in the midwest, who derive their name from the Bible. They treat their children as arrows in a quiver, the more arrows in the quiver, the better the chances of spreading the teachings of Christianity. These are the families with 10 or more children. These high volume families are meant to achieve several things - a larger population of Christians, a stronger fight against the evils of society and the stretching and unimaginable fatigue to the mother's reproductive system - (vagina).

The evils they fight include:
- divorce
- adultery
- abortion/contraception
- internet pornography

All of these, of course, have to do with sex. So, with this I'm lead to believe that abundant and constant sex is perfectly fine - if you are married, not taking birth control or using a condom, or looking at mrskin.com while you are having said sex.

The father of the family, often militaristic and diligent in his faith and its execution, is the leader. Their traditionalism traces itself back to the Bible where the man was, of course, the provider and ruler of the family. This anachronistic way of living reverts the woman onto her back, once again, as she is used as the producer/storer/etc. of each of the 10? 15? children in her husband's family.

Now, I did the math, and if a woman has 15 children, that equals over 11 years of pregnancy. I've never been pregnant, but I have known some women to be sick (vomiting, dizzy, SICK) for each of those 9 months in succession. And yet, the women of these families are still not deserving of the title of "leader of the family." (I guess to them, a penis is sort of like a scepter that's given to you at birth)

So in the article I read, one of the family members was going into the Marines. Here is where my confusion really sets in -

Sex (with people you're not married to) = baaaad
Killing people in the name of God = perfectly acceptable


Maybe I need to revert back to my WWJD bracelet I used to wear in middle school for guidance. So what would Jesus do in this situation - either he would go to war and get shot immediately in his attempt to "turn the other cheek." Or he would kill a slue of foreign men and go home to have sex with his wife over and over and over again until they had to swim through the babies in his house to find air and safety. Yep, that sounds like Jesus alright.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Alright, not all of my posts have to be angry & "bitchy."

Here is the proof: I had a lovely weekend.

I enjoyed the hell out of the movie Blade on Friday night. This was the first time I saw this famous Wesley Snipes gem. Yes I do realize it came out 11 years ago, I'm not the biggest movie buff. I think I spent too much of my childhood/adolescence staring into the distance and having really awful haircuts. That leaves no time for movies.

Saturday was super-productive, switched to winter clothes now & packed away my summer stuff, or at least a lot of it (dork). I don't want to have to go through too much when it's time to start packing for South America in <2 months.

Saturday evening I went to my first swing dancing lesson. Awesome. I danced with so many characters - mostly awkward older men. I'll give you a few shining examples.

Rick Moranis -
This guy was an inch or two shorter than me with glasses and a nice blue dress shirt. I guess he was around 40? I'm bad at guessing age.

I commented on how the music was slower than I thought when we started dancing. He didn't respond, not even with an "uh-huh" for reassurance. So I repeated it in a different word order. Still nothing. I thought to myself, am I talking out loud? I decided after careful though, yes, yes I did speak out loud. A few seconds later he commented on how much slower the music was, slower than he had expected.

He had two moves - we move forward, back, forward, step out, he spins me, I spin back, repeat. Next move is a little more complicated - we end up side by side with our arms somehow interlocked, I lean into him and then he pushes back and spins me out and I spin back. He told me that was his special move, so that when people ask me how he was as a dancer I could say "wow! he was fun!"

I spent most of the night averting my eyes from his whenever he was in my immediate perimeter which seemed to be pretty often.

Stinks -
This guy was sweet. He was probably around 50 or so. He had on a loose fitting button up shirt like he was dressing up on vacation. He taught me the Charleston. His BO was so pungent and sour it almost seemed like it would make a good cooking smell. You know how some things smell so terrible and taste so good? Unfortunately for this guy, the taste was probably as bad as the smell and god knows I wasn't going to find that out for sure. Bottom line - sweet but sour.

Asian Wonder -
This guy was on fire. His dancing was really fluid, everyone thought he was an instructor, his dance card was full the whole night. I was dared into dancing with him, which I took up. He spun me like crazy. It turns out he is not an instructor, he just loves to dance & he's good at it. He's also an improviser and said that as long as we were both moving at the same time it worked. I didn't know if that would work in my case, but either way he lead extremely well and I didn't end up on my face at any point so it was great.

Oh geez. Little Asian man, age 60(?) and the top of his head came up to my eyes. He found me on the side and asked me to dance, I said yes. We proceed to "jerk" about, his hands holding mine and moving in a punching motion. I was just hoping he wouldn't make me hit myself in the face like a cruel sibling joke (stop hitting yourself, stop hitting yourself).

His eyes darted all around, looking at me every 8th or 9th glance.

He asked my name and when I told him Jenna he was like "what name that?" Your mom's invention?"

I could not decipher this the first time, so I replied "my mom's name is Janet!"

"NO, no! Your mom invention."

I told him it did exist before she named me Jenna, it was Arabic.

He said that I don't look Arabic, I agreed, we go on jerking arms.

He said he came there every weekend as his exercise for the week. I'm assuming he didn't actually take the classes that went on prior to the free-dance we were enjoying. I used context clues such as him spinning me like people spin the Wheel of Fortune. He grabbed my hand, moved it quickly to the left and let go, letting me do the rest of the work. All the while his eyes continued to dart, to the other couples, to the band playing, to his next victim, to Rick Moranis?

Saturday night - we got back home & I stayed up with Dusty laughing about the possibilities of Newman's Own dressing, like African American Newman's Own & even Zombie's Own - tastes like brains.

"Haven't you seen me on the bottle with a sprig of mint behind my ear & a toga for Newman's Caesar and Caesar light dressing?"

Sunday was also very productive. Most of my lesson plan is done for the week & I'm ready to collect some serious Dine Out $$$ this week.